Wednesday, January 25, 2012


I have had some ups and downs recently. More downs than ups, I am healthy so that is a up, but with my attitude and moods changing into a slight depression its dragging me down.  I am not trying to make this sound like a pity party, blah blah blah I am depressed. But in the long run I think that I am going through a depression, I think that all the stuff that is going through my mind is dragging me down and not wanting to let me get to the full potential that I really want to be at.
Some look at me and see a boy, some look at me and see a cub, some look at me and see Robert. I really just want everyone to look at me and see Robert, the real me, I am a boy, I am a cub, but they do not define me as who I am or who I want to be. I am just your average 23 year old that is HIV +, I am interested in Culinary, Planes, Leather, and so much more. But that is who I am.  I have leather titles, and I hold a Mama's Family name and I am glad to be apart of all of that.
Still not sure what I am getting at with writing this blog, essentially I guess I am just saying that I am a boy, but it doesn't define me. I hope that makes sense. Otherwise I just wrote randomness things.  I am NOT in search of a collar, leash, lock or anything from a Sir/SIR/Dom/DOM/Daddy/DADDY. I just want to be me, and lately its been getting harder to be me. So I really just want to step further steps back away from everything even though I just stepped forward again, I don't think I'm ready to be back to where I was back in Oct.

Sorry if I have lost You all by writing this just trying to get things off my mind.

boy Robert

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